Other People's Mothers

Julie Marie Wade


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Available for pre-order. This book will be available September, 2025
 

A nostalgic and poignant coming-of-age story told through one young woman’s relationships with the mother figures in her life  
 
“Explores what we learn and carry into adulthood about care, our bodies, silence, anger, fear, jealousy, death, and desire from watching and listening to our mothers, when, oftentimes, they do not realize we are paying attention.”—Julia Koets, author of PINE and The Rib Joint: A Memoir in Essays  
 
“In Other People’s Mothers, a young girl pieces together clues to the mystery of what it will mean to be a grown woman by observing the various mothers of her friends and classmates. In a world of piano lessons, Pink Pearl erasers, embarrassing swim parties, and miniature red boxes of Sunmaid raisins, Wade finds the comic and heartbreaking universals. As with all the best books, I was sorry to turn the last page.”—Debra Dean, author of Hidden Tapestry: Jan Yoors, His Two Wives, and the War That Made Them One  
 
“I have always found a great delight in reading the essays of Julie Marie Wade. She brings such tenderness and curiosity to the art of chronicling an American childhood, and in this new collection, each essay offers a poignant and often hilarious account of those early lessons about gender, friendship, and self-discovery. If you’re new to Julie Marie Wade’s work, prepare to be enchanted!”—Daisy Hernández, author of A Cup of Water Under My Bed: A Memoir  
 
Other People's Mothers is unlike any other memoir I've ever read. Through a series of vignettes, young Julie searches among her friends’ mothers for acceptance and affection, for a possible path forward in a world seemingly designed for—and by—girls who don’t look, feel, or think like her. By the end of this journey, Julie has come to realize that other worlds exist, worlds she’ll discover or create both on her own and with her discovered tribe. It’s exhilarating to realize that we, like Julie, can turn exile into freedom, and freedom into love.”—Paul Griner, author of The Book of Otto and Liam
 
“Each piece in this collection feels like a balloon floating over fences and into the backyards of other families where a daughter’s future unfolds through accumulating discovery. I’m reminded of that famous realization in Elizabeth Bishop’s ‘In the Waiting Room’—'But I felt: you are an I.’ Other People’s Mothers offers a complex reveal of how one becomes an ‘I.’”—Brian Leung, author of A Terrifying Brush with Optimism
 
Relationships between mothers and daughters can often be complicated and fraught. Even in the best of circumstances, many of us may have grown up curious about the mothers of our friends—looking to them, learning from them (for better or for worse), and wondering what it would be like to be a part of their families.
 
Other People’s Mothers is a collection of interconnected, autobiographical essays that explore the relationship between a daughter, her mother, and the other mothers present in their lives. In this coming-of-age memoir, Julie Marie Wade traces a nexus of female influences on her formative years in the ’80s and ’90s. Through words and actions, the women around her communicate powerful and often contradictory messages about class, religion, education, and morality, holding enormous power over Wade’s journey toward adulthood.
 
In expanding her exploration of motherhood and daughterhood to include these “other mothers,” Wade takes a new and surprising kaleidoscopic approach to her portrayals of family life. This book reveals a young woman in the late twentieth century grappling with gendered expectations, beauty and body ideals, and complex messages about who she is permitted—or destined—to become.  
 
Julie Marie Wade is the author of many collections of poetry and prose, including The Mary Years; Otherwise: Essays; and Just an Ordinary Woman Breathing. Wade is a winner of the Lambda Literary Award for Lesbian Memoir and grants from the Kentucky Arts Council and the Barbara Deming Memorial Fund. She is professor of English and creative writing at Florida International University.
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